才写了几行字，就有8个问号，重重地叹气。 不写了，还是忙着写功课好，不会东想西想。
考完试，要找一人好好问问。毕业后，把一家一当都变卖掉（护照要留），去很远的地方，在那里住下，学烧菜，学钢琴。。。还要狠狠地睡觉。

Another busy day passed by, I spent yesterday and today's precious time on trying out different "reminder" software. Downloaded "power notes" which will expire in 14 days.. and some other crap ones, can't be bother to metion them(well, webcalender seems fun but not quite what I want). Bought APC magazine because I caught a glimpse of the word "zoneAlarm" on the CD content. Thought it might be the one has alarm function, but ended up with a useless personal firewall program(since I won't use it).
................................................
Our group has been scheduled to have a debate with another team on friday's seminar but I cannot find my other 2 team members.. frustrating.. am I going to debate on my own?
Thanks Carol for sending me 1mb reading material which will keep my night busy.
................................................
Got a box of Korean noodle from dear Vivian.She cooked this morning and it was so nice... (was<- I ate it although I had dinner before focus team).Don't know what to say.. Vivian has 5-6 months pregnancy and is still taking care of us.I said to myself I will cook for her or take care of her when her tummy got big but I cannot even look after myself well under stress. sigh..
................................................
back to study!

没劲没劲， 全天下的人都blog得如此深奥， 我看也看不懂。（今天，发现提姆，兰伯特的blog, Lecturer也写blog。。。晕） 晓荼也加了中文部落格，还有artoo..他们都可以写很长很长的文字。。。我的为什么写不长呢？

有时只想记一些零碎小事在这里，大事会写日记，有的连日记里都不记， 怕老了死了（掉了）后，被人拿来读。 心里的秘密，只有神知道。
我每天都会开电脑， 我的IE上有Blogger的Toolbar. 所以常把它用来当notepad. 在不同的电脑上都可以看到我的bookmark. 我又可以少用一点大脑。

你执起你的火柴， 一路走着， 典当着你所有的东西。
手紧紧握着，小心翼翼。有人跟你说它能取暖， 你说我知道， 只是我的火柴积存太久，无法自燃。你说，我在寻找我的火源， 找到了我就不再寒冷。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
戈莫说，对不起，请让开，这是我的树。 它的弧度，正适合我的背脊，它的树叶正好帮我挡去阳光。 这里不吵不闹，正好让我读书。
求你，我没有其他地方可以去了。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
卡说, 多少年来， 我一直没有变, 我用超过爱我生命的爱来爱他.
我爱着的就是这样一个无药可救的人.
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
言语是胶囊外的糖衣，
帮你把苦咽下去.

前一天，听到某某与某某即将走在一起，很开心。但有人提醒我不要瞎起哄，不要好好好，我支持你们！ 他们的决定一定要经过深思熟虑的。好吧，我先收起我的兴奋。。。哈哈，还是很开心。。。。（嗯。。又不是自己。。如果是自己。。一定是趴在床上笑的爬不起了。）
.....................................
上星期陪她去开刀的那个朋友，昨天告诉我她去复诊了，一切都好。 上帝保佑，那医生没开错地方，大幸大幸！ 她拉着我的手臂，轻轻问我愿不愿意做她的干妹妹。。 哈哈， 又开心了。。。

The heaviness of my body.
Really really sad that I had experienced this nightmare during past 10 mins. (again in this month).
Incapable of crying out, incapable of controlling of my phyiscal body while awake,which being pulled apart from my thoughts and soul. I am not going to write about it because I have recorded so many times before. This time I know the exact duration because I just set my alarm clock before bed.
Reminder :
- Good to leave a light on in the room.
- Never stay up after 3am, because it is a not-so-good way to suicide.
Question: If we gonna leave our physical body on earth after we die, what kind of pain we get from the eternal fire? (the earth could be the centre of the Hell?) (Fire and worm just a symbol right?)

I am so blessed that I can attend cbs every week during my university life. I am so blessed that I moved to Kingsford after year 2. This saves 2-3 hour travelling each day and allows me have more time to study, sleep and go to church. We prayed for our MBF's extra bible study during Growth Group yesterday. Pray that Christ will strengthen us and help us to share His words with others. Everything is according to His will and established in Love.
.........................................................
I walked home with a big smile on my face (8pm on a dark street so no one will see). Surely I am happy. Not the two bowls of Laksa I had today, not the enlightenment from cbs but something NoT new under the sun. ( you can trace the four letter on above passage :P).
.........................................................
N gave me a hazelnut icecream today during the lunch, I accepted without doubt again... I am hopeless. Anyone can seduce me with delicious food at anytime.

Fixed! The problem with my pc was just the power supply - which converts AC to DC for the operation of a computer. It was too old and I guess too dusty as well. On the way to the computer shop, I dropped my computer box twice, except from the scratches on the external case, the RAM sticks shifted their places(and the little cooling fan on the motherboard is not working). When I turnt it on, my computer can only detect 64MB (of 256MB). So tested again and again for each stick in different receptacle. Now they works perfectly! So my pc is saved from the fate of formatting.
......................................
UNSW singapore campus , officially starts in 2007? Wonder how many students will still go unsw sydney at that time.

My computer broke down without a sign.
Thanks scott for getting my files out of my hard disk. Just copied them onto school machine therefore I can continue writing my assignment. For the rest of the week, i will not be able to use my own pc.
This is the first tragedy happen to me on my own computer....( I have broken down many many others but not my own :P).... Actually someone just reminded us to backup our files this afternoon during bible study. We can never ever put our faith in this little "evil" box.. its evilness tempted me to open it everyday and glued me in front of it. And it made life soooooo miserable when I come to think about it losing it...
Sitting in the heavily air-polluted computer lab now..tired and sleepy...really wish I can be home...

Spent whole morning trying to convert my html file to pdf format therefore my assignment can be printed out nicely on cse printer.(no acrobe writer) So I installed pdfedit995 and pdf995 and download this and that.. just didn't work... i even planned to pick up LateX...Tell me about it. ftp to uni, type command then ftp back to see? I gave up. Until late late afternoon, when I searched my cds for some fast music, I came cross my old backup disc which has old version of HTMLDOC(www.easysw.com) in it!!!!! lalalala....
well, I still have a thousands of words essay to accomplish by tomorrow :P

不要开学，没有功课，我是仙人~~
仙人今晚要熬夜写report~~

Stayed in Prince of Wales Hospital whole day with a friend for her operation on a cyst. The surgery doctor came 4 and half hour after the appointment time. I was so sleepy while waiting so I swapped with her and slept on her bed. I suddenly realised why patient is called "patient"...

church camp 2004 @ Fotopic.Net
I took some random photos during the camp. Photos record our past. Wish years later, I can still recognise all those faces.
Isaiah 40:31
Those who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary;
they shall walk and not faint.

Sometimes our hearts ache for someone dear to us or just ourselves who are in real need of God's love, forgiveness,peace or any of the wonderful gifts God promises. We pray earnestly and see no results. It is so easy to give up because we cannot wait and rest in Him. But God has his own timing, may we be encouraged to continue to wait on the Lord and be prepared. We may not as fortunate as some others who can see the answer to their prayers, but God will help us to have faith in him.

你写的东西， 我用我的方式去理解， 去转译；之后也只有我能读懂，我也不会告诉你， 告诉你就不好玩了， 只有在不某而和中才有乐趣， 对吗？（玩心太重， 是不好的。）
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
幸福的时候，总希望时光静止，因为它太短暂。 天国很美好，但不一定有相同的片刻。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
Church camp 的第一天，吃早餐时，与Judy坐在一起， 倒了咖啡被她看见。 不让我喝。 跑去倒了牛奶给我， 还有果汁。。感动了半天。
另一人替我喝掉了那一杯咖啡，说好喝。可是我的咖啡一定很苦，因为没有糖。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
Bushdancing 很热闹，这么多人在一个屋檐下同时跳舞。
有幸与“Dancing-king“跳了一次舞，跳完， 那支舞便结束了。
和Art，Earnest 也跳了舞。 还被Judy拍了下来，很惨又被她笑。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
周日，5点多醒，去看日出。 走出life advanture site，看到了别人的小农庄。 一个人在没有人的公路上走了很久。 感觉很特别，因为是早上，一点也不怕。 往回走时遇到一个CCC男生， 他从Merroo穿过重重bush来到我们这边。 迷了路， 看见我们的房子以为绕回了他自己的Church camp。 我给他指了方向，于是他拿着他那根木杖继续按原路走回去。很佩服此人，上帝保佑他能安全返回。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
晚上做梦，梦到s在她的日记上记她的感受。和我的竟然一样，梦中的我很感动，也很难受。 她的内心，也是我不懂的。 我们两个人都彼此隐藏得很好。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
早上4点33分，上铺一阵剧烈震动，随着一串呢喃梦话。。接着又是寂静。。过一会儿又听到有人磨牙。。嘿嘿。。。时间还早可以继续睡。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
V是刚刚来的一个女孩,她有一个双胞胎的妹妹在上海. 很文静的一个女生.我也在mbf有两年了,应该学着照顾新来的人了.
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
与Sandra沟通不多,总是被她照顾,不懂如何关心她.
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
GG永远那么可爱. 那我早睡,她悄悄地爬上我的床,亲了一下我的脸颊. 然后,又爬去yang的床..
让我想起了小时候.
很喜欢荡秋千,梦想以后的家也有这样一片后院,有秋千,可以荡得很高,看到很远的山谷. 有风有云,有好听的鸟叫,而且荡多久头也不会晕.
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
如果没有感情的困扰与纠缠,生活一定会变得简单很多. --- 2004.4.13

我会计较你眼神注视的方向, 抬头若触不到你的眼光, 我的心会黯淡.所以,我选择不抬头,不看你,这样你也伤不了我.我的确是在逃避, 逃避一个内心挣扎的我.

舅舅在整理家中的东西. 光是久枝的已有十几箱. 我喜欢的那一橱名画书集,也许会被贱卖掉. 就算他帮我寄过来, 我也不一定有地方安置它们. 更何况毕业后,我身在何处我自己也不知道. 未来的路也许会很长, 现在的心境有些浮躁,洗过澡洒了一些甜甜香味的perfume, 放上enya的<水印>. 希望能尽快清醒.

I haven't watched TV for days... really missed it but I will leave for church camp during the easter break. (cannot carry it). I will bring some electronic stuff I guess like last time - kettle,camera,discman and recharger. No hair dryer and heat blanket b'coz it is not myc...not cold... And just saw the room allocation maps today.. 16 girls in one room! I guess I haven't slept with so many since kindergarten age. Feel like I am really going to a "camp". Fun ! Fun!
Something will be challenging during the camp is how to deal with the relationship with others. In the past week or so ( or years?), I tend to lock up myself.... I found hard to talk to others... my verbal ability hit its low limitation. Now I have to force myself to see and live with others.
.......................................................................
Tracy will come tomorrow and join us to the camp.
.......................................................................
Wahh, saw albert tonight! He waved to someone in my classroom! (who?)
I was stunned by that....

每一次我将我未来的期盼用肯定式过早的讲出来后，它们总会变成灰烬，仿佛在嘲笑我对现实的乐观和幼稚。