Gravitational Waves, disturbances in space-time that are believed to spread outwards at the speed of light from locations where masses are being rapidly accelerated. Possible sources of such waves include: violent supernova explosions, which are accompanied by the collapse of stellar cores to form neutron stars or black holes; interacting black holes; pulsars (rotating neutron stars); and binary systems of neutron stars as their components coalesce and die.

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巴爾札克的文章都很強調passion, 他说若没有passion, 就不会有人类的历史,宗教与文化. 因他提及宗教, 让我想到Mel Gibson把電影命名為The Passion of The Christ. 是否人類的原動力源于熱情熱誠或激情?耶穌基督死在十字架上的行為只是他的一時衝動? 工作學習婚姻若缺了這一個元素, 是否還能維持?或開始的必要?
剛巧查了下字典, 才發現passion一詞P大寫後, 意思與我原先理解的大為不同. 是專指耶稣的受难和死亡的.

Passion
n.
The sufferings of Jesus in the period following the Last Supper and including the Crucifixion.
受難耶穌在最後的晚餐之後, 包括被釘死在十字架的時期內所受的苦難.
A narrative, musical setting, or pictorial representation of Jesus's sufferings.

passion
n.
激情, 热情
1.A powerful emotion, such as love, joy, hatred, or anger.
2.Ardent love.
3.Strong sexual desire; lust.
4.The object of such love or desire.
5.Boundless enthusiasm

若再仔細看一下字源, 此字suffer的涵義要大大超過an overwhelming emotion.
from Medieval Latin passi0 passi0n[ sufferings of Jesus or a martyr]
from Late Latin [ physical suffering, martyrdom, sinful desire ]
from Latin[ an undergoing ] 一次經歷
from passus,past participle of patº[ to suffer ]
源自 passus, patº 的過去分詞 [ 遭受 ]

We are sometimes stirred by emotion and take it for zeal.
有時我們僅僅感情用事卻誤以為熱忱.

i love Play School!

well, i cannot live a life like this, i cannot submerse myself in toys stories forever.
i really need to face my adulthood which means I have to face job interviews and a long term career. ( this might sound a bit contradict what I mentioned I felt "old" last time. Guess it is because there is a huge interregnum between my childhood and the current retirement state.)

Most of the people knows that I am bad with words. I just CAN'T express well, it gets worse when I speek Englesh. You should be well prepared not to faint when i'm uttering those truncated sentences and mis-pronunced words. thank God, I'd already improve a bit and tend to be more talkative - which also means I care less if you faint.

Speech - it is still my greatest fear when I try to sell myself on the job market. I think it was the main reason why I chose computing as my career path because I don't need to talk to human! After 4 years self-realization, I found I am not good at mastering any languages( java, guava, whateva)... so what should I do in the future?
Are there any jobs don't require verbal communication? And think it over again, how can I do God's ministry if I cannot overcome this difficulty? God has spoken to us by His words, we can only share the gospel by telling others. All in the package of People ministry - meeting with people and relate to them and communicate with them. Why do I find it so hard?

Famous edvard munch's "the scream" was "taken" from its museum.
The drama of "the scream" was on the Sketch Show on the same day.

I sticked my father's father's photo on the wall.
Then I received a letter from him.

是起埃與始埃教 我玩的這個紙牌遊戲, 叫釣魚. 將54張牌面朝下9x6排好,由一個人開始翻牌, 每次只能翻兩張, 若兩張一樣,就可以拿起, 再可翻兩張; 不同的話,就將牌按原樣朝下合好. 輪到下一個人, 也一樣. 所以要憑記憶記住自己和別人翻開過的牌的花色和所在的位子, 下次到你時就可以把它們湊成對, 最後誰手中牌多誰就是贏家. "這張在那裡見過", "這張應該在這,沒錯"...我想我不得不承認這是一個防止老年痴呆的好方法.

很久沒玩過這個遊戲了,為什麼要提起? 只是今天白天有一閃而過的錯覺...感覺怪怪的.
IUC晚到了十分鐘, 坐在後面, 看到的是眾人的背與另外半邊人的側臉, 我通常不會明目彰膽地四處張望, 只是眼角會暼到一些人, 認識的人比較容易認出. 站起坐下時看到, 可以模糊地確定他們的方位.
有 一個朋友一直回頭看, 也許想和我們坐後面的人打個眼神的招呼吧. 我抬頭又剛好錯過她的臉. 我想還是聽講道重要, 招呼可以待會ㄦ打. 後來, Joshua講得好笑時, 笑側了臉,無意中看到了不同方向的人. 那個一直回頭看的朋友居然坐到了那一邊. 再去看看剛才那個, 是我不認識的人. 後來又發現一個坐在很遠角落的人,竟然安安穩穩在我的正前方. 所以突然有種錯覺, 這裡的人都是合著的一張張牌,一樣都是成雙的, 只是他們背對你你看不到, 他們偶爾會回頭, 所以他們一回頭,就要用力地記住他們的臉....

和我一樣的那個人在哪裡? 她回頭, 我看見她時會驚詫到什麼程度? 她會看到我嗎, 會開心嗎? 會有這樣一個人嗎?

今天我明明遇到了呀, 在我身邊, 這麼近, 連呼吸也感覺得到,
一秒的奇妙, 我又一次找回了我試圖擺脫的影子,
一秒已足夠, 足以讓我不妄終身.

'你是玩牌的人', 有聲音提醒我,'你怎麼可能和牌在一起?'

哦..........是嗎 是嗎 我能坦然地抽身離開嗎? 而你只是一張牌, 我隨時想推開就能推開的嗎?


(現在想來, 有些好笑, 也終於領悟出平時Judy總是叫我們坐在前排的緣由了.)

Isaiah 40

15Behold, the nations are like a drop from a bucket,
and are accounted as the dust on the scales;

15看哪 ，万民都像水桶的一滴，又算如天平上的微尘。

王朔 說:"這個世界很單純﹐人和人之間需要的其實不多﹐互相了解只能橫生誤會。" 他又說:"年輕的時候認為有很多重要的東西在前面﹐只要不停奔走就能看到﹐走過來發現重要的都在身后發生了﹐已經過去了﹐再往前又是一片空白。" 為何我有同感?
年輕時候的理想和那些很久沒哼的歌一樣, 有些記得但又不願用力去想. 少了對世俗的一份貪戀, 看多了人的醜陋, 留下一顆灰得不能再灰的心. 用什麼力繼續往前奔?

很多人是愛戴著有色鏡看世界的, 我指的是樂觀的紅黃藍綠. 而我喜歡黑白, 喜歡把彩色的圖轉變成grayscale,慢慢來欣賞深淺層次. 我的世界是灰色的, 無法觸及那头的窒息的黑暗,和另一头讓人心碎的純白, 只能茍且介於黑與白的陰暗中.
據說很多人老了後, 辨色力會削弱, 看出去的世界不如年輕人的五光十色, 但他們能看得更透更徹底. 他们的眼睛, 其實是比我們犀利得多..
色彩是用來自欺欺人的工具, 就像年輕一樣.

If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame...

缺顏色
Cold yellow,warm red and black
2xcool blue,warm blue, ultramarine blue, cerulean blue.
too many blues.

Cleaning up all the files in my cse directory using the powerful rm -r command.
Surprisely I notices my account won't expire till next year March and after diskguessing I realize they increased my disk quota as well (trying to squeeze my files to minimum size was part of my daily tasks).Then "pp" some other friends, none of them has this "privilege" and their acc will expire this month. Oh well, do I need to access cse for any reason? pine?ssh?.friend? something was very important to me but now is useless.

几日前, 将整一瓶葡萄酒打破, 洒了一地, 浓浓的红色像血一样. 一边擦一边还有人讲杀人故事给我听, 心情可想而知. 第二天俐在别人的怂恿下买了四瓶 Baileys Irish cream liqueur回来, 她尝了一口, 但不喜欢. 那天我正好和W在家, 看到这酒四目放光, 马上拿酒杯, 我是连瓶倒的-酒鬼的本性毕露, W是喜好其巧克力味, 仰颈了许久,确定酒杯滴干才罢休. 幸好还有一个清醒的人在一边给我们翻圣经读."不可好酒" (提摩太前书3:3 ). 昨日向朋友请教酒醉经验(自己没醉过), 朋友说酒与海鲜不可同食, 曾试过两次, 喝完就两眼发黑. 个人体质不同吧, 食红肉配红酒, 食海鲜配白酒, 岂不是误导人?
现在冰柜中还有两瓶, 肚里空空, 蠢蠢欲动, 咳...self control!

每天若能藏在家里就藏在家，继续过米虫的生活， 不想去工作;
今天花了一上午等雨停, 花了一个中午煮菜,一个下午准备BibleStudy,一个晚上查经.十点半跑去别人家,然后逛supermarket, 又花了一个小时. 买了一堆不是很需要的东西。
米虫又蛀掉一天。
朋友提醒：米虫的体型快和下面的稻草人差不多了，ahhh! 准备减肥！